


playlist

by shuafulz



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Bottom Yoon Jeonghan, Concerts, F/M, Fluff, Heavy Angst, M/M, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Smut, Top Hong Jisoo | Joshua
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:26:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27302641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shuafulz/pseuds/shuafulz
Summary: Jeonghan entered the concert alone and left with someone.
Relationships: Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan, Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Seokmin | DK, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 12
Kudos: 50





	1. gigs

**Author's Note:**

> will start updating after i finish my first fic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gigs were never Jeonghan's thing until

Joshua confidently went up to the stage with his guitar. Shouts from the audiences are very audible, mostly women. He flashed his billion dollar smile and pushed his blond hair back, making the girls bite their lips and men stare at him with awe.

"CTRL J!" The emcee announced.

Jihoon started playing his drums, followed by Seungcheol's piano, and Wonwoo's bass. Lastly, Joshua started to riff his guitar, making the audience shout louder.

_Bite your face to spite your nose._

"Sing with me." Joshua said and the crowd did so.

_17 and a half years old._

_Worrying about my brother finding out._

_What's the fun in doing what you're told?_

Jeonghan was never into gigs, especially these gigs where all people do is make out in the bathroom and have sex.

And that's what his friends are doing. Glancing to his left, he saw Seokmin and Soonyoung planting soft kisses on each other. On his right, Seungkwan and Vernon were sweet talking.

He sighed. This was not his first gig to attend to. He attended a lot because of his friends. He did enjoy. A little.

He didn't like crowded places, especially loud ones. He likes music, but he likes to enjoy it by himself.

The crowd exclaimed when the emcee announced the next band. On the corner of his eyes, he saw a god-like man enter the stage.

_Oh my God._

Jeonghan's eyes are full of adoration as he stared at the blonde vocalist with a guitar. The vocalist flashed a sexy smile that made the crowd shout louder.

He started singing a familiar song and Jeonghan felt like he just heard an angel sing a sinful song about sex. But he swore that he wanted to hear it again and again.

The vocalist kept on glancing at the crowd and smirking. Jeonghan saw the crowd's reaction everytime the vocalist smirked and licked or bit his lip. He can definitely relate.

_One moment, I tearing up your blouse,_

_Now you're living in my house,_

_What happened to 'just messing around?'_

The crowd sang with him. Jeonghan knows this song. He loves the artist. But that's not what he's thinking about. He's thinking about the man in front. His manly but angelic features. His sexy stage presence. His heavenly voice. And his sinful aura.

Maybe Jeonghan would at least learn to love gigs more.

"Thank you for coming tonight!" Joshua said at the crowd.

People shouted and clapped for them which was heavenly to Joshua's ear.

"We hope you guys had fun!" Wonwoo, his bassist said.

"Enjoy the rest of the night!" Seungcheol.

"Once again, thank you. We are CTRL J!" Jihoon smiled.

The four got down the stage and sat on their table, full of drinks and chips.

Joshua was about to pull out his wallet when a girl appeared and sat on his lap.

"Don't worry, it's on the house, daddy." She said as she looked at Joshua with full lust.

Joshua reached for her lips and plunged his tongue inside her mouth without warning. Tugging her bottom lip, Joshua's hands went to her lap and caressed it.

"Thanks, baby." Joshua smirked.

"Get a fucking room, Joshua." Wonwoo laughed.

"Tell than to them." Joshua pointed at Jihoon and Seungcheol, about to make out.

"I hate it here." Wonwoo said as he chugged down a whole glass of beer.

"You know, someone's interested in meeting you." Joshua told Wonwoo as he reached for a glass of beer. 

"Everyone's interested in meeting me." Wonwoo said with a poker face which made Joshua laugh.

"Mingyu. From the Medicine department. Cool guy, he's an athlete." Joshua said.

"Pass." Wonwoo said.

"Come on, Wonwoo. Loosen the fuck up! Watching anime all day with your cats is fun but you're missing the WHOLE fun out there!" Joshua said, his hands now on the hem of the girl's skirt.

Wonwoo noticed and just smirked at his friend while shaking his head.

Joshua felt like he's not in the mood to fuck, but he doesn't wanna hurt the girl's feelings.

"Bathroom. Now." He whispered in her ear.

She giggled and stood up from his lap. Purposely brushing her bottoms against his crotch. She left and Joshua felt more relieved. 

"I have a condom with me." Seungcheol said.

"No, thanks. Use it with Jihoon. You might want numbers of rounds." Joshua said which made all four of them laugh.

"Raw?" Jihoon asked.

"No, I'm not in the mood to fuck." Joshua shook his head.

Joshua stood up and went to the bathroom where he told the girl to be in. 

To his surprise, the bathroom door was locked. He knocked a couple times and fortunately, it opened, revealing the girl he was with before, now naked.

She pulled him inside and locked the door again so no one can disturb them. 

"Baby-"

Joshua was cut off by a kiss. The girl's hands reached for his cock and started palming it.

"Baby, wait." Joshua pushed her away a bit.

"Why?" She asked.

"Look, I'm sorry. I'm really not in the mood today." Joshua said as he reached for his wallet.

The girl was speechless. She was clearly very horny, considering she took off all her clothes for Joshua.

Joshua handed her the money for their drinks.

"I'm really sorry." He repeated and kissed her hair.

She huffed and started to put on her clothes.

"Fucking asshole." She muttered.

Joshua did not feel even a drop of guilt. She should respect if he didn't want to have sex.

He waited for her to finish dressing up. Even if she's wearing her clothes, she still acted lustfully in front of Joshua. Constantly asking him for help on her lingerie and on her zippers.

"Are you sure?" She asked one more time.

"Yes." Joshua said.

The girl then left.

"Thank God."

Joshua walked towards the basin and washed his hands and face, thinking of another gig to pay his bills.

"It's fine, Joshua. You can fucking do this. You're THE Joshua Hong." He said as he looked at himself on the mirror.

Jeonghan didn't know what's more frightening. The fact that his friends are about to have sex tonight or him being on a crowded place or the girl who locked herself in this unisex bathroom and started to undress.

He knew for a fact that the girl was expecting someone. 

_What if they do 'it' here?_

_Of course they'll do 'it' here Jeonghan. She's naked for a fucking reason, dummy._

Jeonghan felt stupid. He doesn't know what to do if someone will have sex here. A wall away from him.

He heard someone enter and he prayed as soon as he heard the footsteps. 

"Baby-"

_Oh my God._

_They'll do 'it'._

Jeonghan shut his eyes and prayed more.

To his surprise, the guy sounded like he didn't want to have sex. Jeonghan felt so thankful. He never felt more relieved.

He heard the door open again, like someone just left.

Silence enveloped the bathroom and Jeonghan figured the both of them left. He was about to open his door when he heard a voice.

"You can do this." The voice from before said.

"You're THE Joshua Hong."

_Who?_

Jeonghan was about to curse himself because he really wanted to get out the bathroom.

He now cursed himself as he loudly put his head on the cubicle door, stupidly not remembering that there's still a person outside.

Joshua was surprised when he heard a noise on the cubicle door.

"Who's that?" He loudly said.

Jeonghan was now shocked at what he's done. He hated at how stupid he was sometimes.

_Prepare for the worst, Jeonghan._

He delicately unlocked his door.

The door slowly opened revealing a guy with black hair and angelic face.

To Jeonghan's surprise, the vocalist was standing right in front of him. Standing tall with his face a bit wet and lips swollen. He looked so handsome and ethereal when closer.

Jeonghan couldn't find the words to say. First, because he's not used to talking to people. Two, he was starstruck with an incredibly handsome man in front of him. And because he couldn't find a way to address this awkward situation.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't know that there's someone here and-"

"How long have you been there?" Joshua cut him off.

"Since she started to undress." Jeonghan said awkwardly. Looking at his feet, hands on his pocket.

Joshua laughed.

"I'm sorry. So you heard all that?" Joshua asked.

"Kinda." Jeonghan looked at him.

"I'm sorry." Joshua laughed.

"It's fine. It happens." Jeonghan smiled back.

Jeonghan was proud of himself for functioning a bit. Before, he was starstruck by just hearing his voice on stage. Now, he felt like he could faint with how close they are, and the way he talks to him, and the way he smiled directly at him.

"I'm Joshua, by the way. Joshua Hong." Joshua said and lent out his hand.

"Je-Jeonghan. Jeonghan Yoon." Jeonghan accepted Joshua's hands.

He can't express how majestic he felt when Joshua's big hands clasped with his.

"You know, I actually-"

Jeonghan was cut off by a frantic knock on the bathroom door.

"JOSHUA!! TIME TO FUCKING GO!! JUN NEEDS HELP ASAP" Seungcheol's voice.

"Fuck! I'm sorry Jeonghan. I need to go. See you around!" Joshua said as he ran out the bathroom, leaving Jeonghan stunned.

Jeonghan looked at the bathroom door.

Joshua Hong.

His name.

Jeonghan never felt more happy. Even Joshua's name was enough for him. 

He smiled while looking at the bathroom door.

_More gigs to come._

He thought as he walked out the bathroom to look for his friends.

Joshua was running out of breath as he entered their van.

"Where's Jun?" He breathlessly asked Wonwoo.

This is the dark side of their gigs.

Jun.

Their other friend who got himself on different kinds of trouble.

"Fought with another one of those psychology kids." Jihoon answered while driving.

"When the fuck will this stop?" Seungcheol cursed.

"It stops when we stop having gigs, Cheol. You know that." Wonwoo hissed.

Jun is popular. Everyone knows him. He knows every bar and every pub that's open for gigs. That's why he manages to have CTRL J to perform on every pub in town. Basically, Jun is their connection, their anchor in their music. Without him, they wouldn't have crowds waiting for them.

The catch is Jun getting on different trouble while managing the band. Because of Jun's popularity, being an athlete and a model student, people wanted to take the image out of him.

But of course, Jun being Jun, he won't let that happen. And it only happens duding the gigs because it's where most students come together and no one can notice if one's missing.

"What if we stop?" Joshua suddenly said.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Seungcheol said with wide eyes.

"We'll be fucking broke." Wonwoo spit out.

"Right, sorry." Joshua said.

Maybe gigs weren't really for Joshua. Maybe he needed another passion. But how?

He felt a tear escape his right eye. He quickly swept it away before anyone notices.

_You can do this._

_You're THE Joshua Hong._

His own words kept repeating in his head.

_I'm Joshua Hong._


	2. dangerous

Jeonghan played with his fingers while holding his VIP Standing ticket. He sighed.

_"It's literally a good memory for an introvert like you. You have to come out of your room sometimes, Jeonghan."_

Seungkwan's words repeated on his head.

_"Why can't you come with me? I'll buy you the same tickets as mine."_

He remembers persuading his friends.

_"Jeonghan, we love you, but you really don't need to be THAT generous even if we're friends."_

Soonyoung's words are now replaying.

Jeonghan stood up from his bed and walked in his walk in closet. Finding clothes to wear tonight. He was torn between a yellow striped shirt and a strawberry pink sweater when his phone rang.

_Mingyu._

The contact name read. 

"Gyu, hey!" Jeonghan greeted while smiling even though Mingyu can't see him.

"Jeonghan! You told me you'll go to a concert tonight, right?" Mingyu asked. Even when Jeonghan can't see him, he felt Mingyu's puppy smile.

"Yes, why?"

 _"JUN AND MINGHAO GET A FUCKING ROOM!"_ A voice in the background said.

Jeonghan figured that Mingyu may be with his music friends.

_"WHY ARE YOU ONLY TELLING US THAT?! TELL THAT TO SEUNGCHEOL AND JIHOON TOO!"_

Jeonghan heard a different voice from earlier, said. Jeonghan laughed silently at Mingyu's friends.

"CAN YOU PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE?" Mingyu shouted, causing silence to linger on his end.

"I'm really sorry about that Jeonghan, it's just my friends, they're kinda wild sometimes." Mingyu apologized.

Jeonghan laughed it off.

"It's fine, why did you ask about the concert anyway?" Jeonghan asked.

"Oh, right, my friends are gonna be there! I figured, since you told me that you're kinda scared to go there alone, maybe they can accompany you." Mingyu enthusiastically said.

Jeonghan loved the idea, but he knew that being Jeonghan, he would be an awkward fuck in front of Mingyu's friends.

"Wait, I'll call one of them. WONWOO!" Mingyu called out, causing another set of shouts that are heard in his background.

_"That's my boy!"_

_"Mingyu, baby, you've grown!"_

The voices teased Mingyu. Jeonghan tried to hide his laugh but failed, especially when he knew who Wonwoo is in Mingyu's life. He just doesn't know what Wonwoo looks like.

"Hey, Jeonghan, right?" Jeonghan heard a different voice now on Mingyu's end. Probably Wonwoo.

"Yes, Wonwoo?" 

"Yeah, uh, Mingyu told me you're also in the same section as us? Troye Sivan, right?" Wonwoo politely asked.

"Yes, I'm alone though." Jeonghan said.

"Great! Uhm, we just can't fetch you from where you live but we can assure you that we'll go with you on your way home." Wonwoo said with a joyful voice.

"It's fine, I have a car with me-"

"REALLY? BETTER!" Wonwoo said out of nowhere, causing Jeonghan to flinch at his phone.

"Oh, I mean, that's good! You'll be safer then. That's what I mean." Wonwoo laughed it off.

"Okay." Jeonghan laughed too.

"Don't worry, we'll be with you the whole night so you won't feel lonely."

"How many are you exactly?" Jeonghan asked.

"UH, wait, me, Cheol, Jihoon-" Wonwoo stopped counting and just mumbled.

"About five of us, plus you, then it makes us six." Wonwoo answered.

"Oh that's great! Mingyu's not coming, right?" 

"Yeah, he has a research to finish." Wonwoo laughed.

"Don't feel awkward though! My friends won't make you feel out of place. I'll just get your number from Mingyu so we can text once we get there." Wonwoo added.

"Sure! Thank you so much, Wonwoo. And to Mingyu too." Jeonghan uttered and bid goodbye to Wonwoo.

He stared at his phone for a moment. Hoping that he won't disappoint his soon to be friends.

"Josh, you've been doing this since high school. Why the hell are you only nervous now?" Seungcheol said as he blew out a smoke from his cigarette.

"I've only done it three times, Cheol. And those previous ones were just small concerts with no tight security. This is different, it's Troye Sivan we're talking about here." Joshua said as he glared at his phone.

"It's perfect! Everything's perfect!" Wonwoo suddenly said out of nowhere and clapped his hands.

"What is?" Jihoon asked.

"Since we're only five, meaning Joshua has no partner, and Mingyu's friend is going alone, it means Joshua can partner up with me, and Mingyu's friend with Jun when we enter the arena by twos." Wonwoo explained.

"Right, they won't be suspicious if it's by twos, since it's usually couples who go to Troye Sivan's." Jihoon realized.

"Jun, make sure you have the fake one with you." Joshua reminded his friend.

Jun then showed him his wallet, revealing the fake ticket.

"Why the fuck do I have to be so broke?" Joshua said and threw his head back.

"You're not broke, Josh. It just so happens that your bandmates won those tickets while you're busy releasing your cum on someone else's pussy." Minghao directly said.

The whole room was filled with laugh at what he said.

"It was worth it though." Joshua said and bit his lip while remembering that night.

"Joshua, you know that literally no one in this room likes girls, except you." Jihoon uttered.

They laughed again while Joshua was busy smoking.

Mingyu then came with another set of his home made nachos, causing the boys to praise him, again.

"I just wanna remind you all that Jeonghan's literally the kindest person ever. Don't do anything stupid." Mingyu warned with a serious face.

 _Jeonghan?_ Joshua thought of that angelic looking guy he met during one of his gigs. He brushed the thought off easily, he figured that it must be just the same name.

"Chill, Gyu. Tell that to Jun and Joshua." Cheol chuckled.

"No, just tell Joshua, I'm not that hyper with other people." Jun said as he lazily picked another plate of nachos to eat.

"Fuck all of you." Joshua said and felt his phone beep. 

An unknown number texted him.

**_"need u rn."_ **

Joshua furrowed his brows and opened the message. Before he could type anything, another message popped out.

_**"josh, right? im the one w/ u at the core last night ;)"** _

Joshua then dawned in realization and smirked as he typed his reply.

_**"wru?"** _

The sender then sent Joshua her location.

"I gotta go somewhere." Joshua told his friends and stood up.

"What the fuck? We literally said that we should go to the concert altogether." Wonwoo glared at him.

"This will be quick, I promise. Two hours max." Joshua then hurriedly left the room.

"The concert literally starts in three and a half hours, what the fuck is your friend thinking?" Minghao said to all of them. 

Joshua entered the mall and immediately went to the third floor comfort room. There he met the girl he's supposed to meet, standing tall while wearing short shorts that fitted her thick thighs and big bottoms. Joshua bit his lip while approaching her. He grabbed her by the waist, making her gasp. He made sure her back felt his growing member.

"You really wanna do it here? Of all places?" Joshua chuckled sexily as he trailed his hands lower on her abdomen.

"I'm horny, Josh. Help me." She said with a lustful tone, making Joshua get hornier.

"Stay here." Joshua said and went inside the men's comfort room, he made sure that every cubicle was empty before calling her in. He placed an 'unavailable' sign in the door while leaving it open, making sure that no one would suspect. He dragged her to the last cubicle and made her face the thin locked door.

"Why the fuck didn't you close the main door?" The girl cursed while moaning as Joshua grinded on her from behind.

"No more questions. Strip for daddy." Joshua said and spanked her round bottoms making her let out a moan.

Joshua placed his left hand on her mouth to keep her quiet, while the other was travelling inside her shirt to grab her breasts. She was naked and trying her best to keep quiet while Joshua was hungrily grinding behind her, fully clothed.

"Suck me." He whispered in her ear.

Joshua knew how dangerous it was for them. But the adrenaline and horniness pushed him.

She immediately got on her knees and unbuckled his shorts, licking his cock while still clothed in his boxers. Joshua held her head and pushed in more towards his crotch. She lowered down his boxers and gasped as Joshua's glorious cock met her face.

"So big." She moaned quietly and started to stroke it.

"I know baby, I know." Joshua smiled sexily.

She wasted no time and immediately put his cock inside her mouth, she started to bob her head up and down faster. Joshua's length was too much that she closed her eyes while feeling the tip brush against the opening of her throat.

Joshua's sinful hands went to her head again.

"Look at me while daddy's fucking your mouth." Joshua commanded. And she did, she tried her best to keep her eyes open while his cock was ravishing her mouth.

Without warning, Joshua released inside her mouth, she tasted his delicious liquid and opened her mouth for him to see.

"Stand up." Joshua said.

She stood up leveled with Joshua. He pinned her against the cemented wall and attacked her neck with wild kisses. He lifted her legs up to wrap around him. Joshua's hand were on her back for support, while the other was playing with her core.

"So wet, so naughty." Joshua smirked while watching her suffer from his hands. He plunged a finger inside, making her yelp. Another finger, making her groan. Third finger made her moan loudly. 

"Shh, fuck it! Be quiet." He hissed.

"Sorry, d-daddy." She stuttered. 

Joshua teased her wet clit with his hard cock. She knew better that to say another word to him. Without warning, Joshua inserted himself inside her. Satisfied at the tightness and warmness of her walls, Joshua started thrusting fast and deep. His cock was buried deep inside her while he aggressively thrusts. His lips found her breasts and played with her nipples, sucking and nibbling it alternately. His hand was still on her mouth to prevent her from making loud noises. 

He felt her legs shake, a cue that she's gonna cum.

"Cum for daddy." As soon as Joshua felt her cum, he pulled out of her and leveled his face with her crotch, tasting her sweet cum.

He then stood again and insert himself inside her. 

"Cum inside me, daddy, please." She quietly begged.

Joshua released his liquid inside her.

"Fuck!" Joshua quietly moaned out of pleasure.

Joshua cleaned themselves up with a towel. 

He then got out of the cubicle first to see if anyone's there. To their luck, no one was. She followed him as he carefully round his eyes at the restroom hallway to see if there's anyone. He sighed as he saw no one. 

"Next time?" The girl asked him as soon as they got out the mall.

"Just text me. Not in the mall restroom anymore. That was boring." Joshua said cockily.

"You like danger, don't you?" She smirked.

He leaned closer to her and whispered.

"I'd have a good fuck even in your parents' house."

'Danger' is Joshua's middle name and he was about to prove it more when he and his friends are nearing the concert venue.

"That guy Jeonghan texted you, Wonwoo." Cheol said while looking at Wonwoo's phone.

"Hand me my phone, I'll reply." Wonwoo ordered and Cheol did.

"Someone smells like sex." Jun teased.

"With a girl." Jihoon added while driving.

"Yeah. It was fun." Joshua smirked.

"Where?" Cheol asked.

"Mall restroom." Joshua confidently answered.

"Dude just what the fuck?" Jun laughed and playfully pushed Joshua, causing the both of them to laugh louder.

"Dorks." Wonwoo said while typing on his phone.

"Be nice to Jeonghan." Wonwoo added while glaring at his friends.

"Easy." Jun and Joshua said in sync.

"Change of plans. We don't have to be in pair. There's too many people at the entrance, I doubt that they'd still give notice to Joshua." Wonwoo said.

"Nice." Joshua smiled.

"But you still have to be with Jun."

They all got out of their car and waited in line at the entrance. Wonwoo was alone in his own lane. Seungcheol and Jihoon are together on the second one. Jun is behind Joshua on the last.

"Keep it cool, Josh. I promise, this is easy." Jun felt his friend getting tense.

"This is a big fucking concert Jun." Joshua said through gritted teeth which made Jun laugh.

"You literally fucked someone on a mall's restroom, and you get nervous on this?" Jun laughed.

Joshua tried to hide his laugh but failed. He turned around to smack Jun on the head.

It was Joshua's turn now, he handed over his fake ticket and surprisingly, it went well.

"Wait." The guard stopped him as he entered.

Joshua turned around with a pale face. He looked at Jun with wide eyes. Jun was shocked too.

"Y-yes?" Joshua nervously asked.

"No water bottles inside the arena."

Joshua felt his blood continued to flow. He nodded his head and threw his bottle at the nearest trash can.

"YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN HIS FACE!!" Jun laughed so hard while teasing Joshua.

"Shut up." Joshua hissed but their friends joined Jun at laughing at him.

They're now finding their place at the VIP Section. The crowd was loud even if it's not yet starting. The lights were dim and they can barely see each other.

"HE WAS LIKE 'Y-Yes?'" Jun laughed loudly and Jihoon and Cheol laughed at how he imitated Joshua.

Joshua was about to throw hands when

"You must be Wonwoo?" A soft voice said in the dark.

Joshua turned around and faced

"Jeonghan?"

"Jeonghan!"

He and Wonwoo said at the same time.

Jeonghan locked eyes with Joshua.

Jeonghan felt his knees weaken when he saw Joshua's god-like face.

"Uh, guys! He's Jeonghan, Mingyu's friend that I was talking about." Wonwoo introduced Jeonghan to his friends while Jeonghan is still staring at Joshua.

Joshua broke the stare.

"This is Seungcheol, Jihoon's boyfriend." 

"Nice to meet you." Jeonghan said shyly and politely.

"No need to be so shy, Jeonghan. I'm Jihoon, his boyfriend." 

Jeonghan smiled and bowed his head a little.

"Jun." Jun smiled.

"Jeonghan." Jeonghan smiled back at him.

"And he's-"

"Joshua." Jeonghan smiled wider when it's Joshua's turn.

Joshua smirked at Jeonghan's reaction. Even when it's dim, they knew what each other's expressions were.

"We've met at that one gig at The Core." Joshua said.

"You know each other?" Wonwoo asked.

"No shit, Wonwoo." Cheol laughed.

Jeonghan didn't feel left out. Except for the fact that he was the only one wearing bright colored clothes and the five were wearing white, black and grey.

Out of nowhere, Jeonghan started to feel cold even when he's wearing his fluffy strawberry pink sweater. Joshua noticed and went nearer to Jeonghan.

"Cold?" Joshua asked.

"A bit." Jeonghan tried his best bot to stare at Joshua for too long, he thought it would make him feel uncomfortable and weird.

As soon as Jeonghan said that, Joshua grabbed his hands and intertwined with his.

Jeonghan can't focus at Troye's heavenly voice as he sang 'Bloom'. Jeonghan was more focused on Joshua's and his hands together.

"Better?" Joshua asked.

"Y-Yes."

"Good." Joshua flashed his billion dollar smirk.

Jeonghan felt warm but dangerous. He wanted to stay like that but something inside him was saying 'no'. 

But being Jeonghan, he loved to be in danger.


	3. fools taste like you

Joshua closed his eyes and felt the music touch his soul. His big hands still intertwined with Jeonghan. He sang his heart out.

Jeonghan glanced at Joshua's way every now and then. Trying hard not to get caught by him. Luckily, Joshua was too drawn at the music and didn't glance his way nor felt him staring at him.

_And my hopes, they are high, I must keep them small_

_Though I try to resist I still want it all._

Joshua felt like the world was playing with him as he sang the words. His messed up life flashed in his mind.

Jeonghan noticed Joshua's troubled face and clasped their hands tighter, making Joshua look his way with a surprised expression. Jeonghan smiled sweetly in response.

"You alright?" He asked.

_But everything is shattering and it's my mistake_

_Only fools fall for you_

"Yes." Joshua smiled.

But Jeonghan was good at knowing when people lie, and he knew that Joshua was a big liar right now.

The concert was about to end and their hands were still intertwined. Through the pink lights in the dim, Seungcheol noticed Joshua's hands clasped with Jeonghan. He was about to tease them when Jihoon stopped him.

"Seungcheol Choi. No. Don't even think about it." Jihoon said quietly through gritted teeth while facing the stage.

The crowd cheered louder as Troye was leaving the stage. The lights opened and Joshua suddenly let go of Jeonghan's hand. Joshua tried hard not to glance on Jeonghan's way.

"So, you sure you're alright to go home alone?" Wonwoo asked Jeonghan worriedly.

"I'm fine, I came here alone, so, yeah." Jeonghan laughed.

"Well, in that case-"

"ATTENTION! ALL AUDIENCE'S TICKETS WILL BE INSPECTED PER SECTION." The venue's speakers suddenly said.

"Fuck! They know." Jun cursed.

Joshua's face paled as he heard the full announcement.

"Know what?" Jeonghan asked curiosuly.

"Josh, you have to get out. Now." Jihoon said.

"No, Jihoon, staffs are guarding all entrance and exits. How the fuck can Joshua go?" Seungcheol said loudly, making some people look their way.

"Cheol, be fucking quiet!" Wonwoo hissed.

Jeonghan looked at the five of them, curious and worried.

"No, I can handle this." Joshua said.

"How?" 

"Let Jeonghan get out of this first." Joshua said as he glanced at Jeonghan's way.

"W-What's happening?" Jeonghan asked.

They were about to answer when the venue staffs asked them to line up and hold out their tickets.

"Fuck!" Joshua cursed.

"Josh, there's an emergency exit at near us." Jun said and pointed to a sign that says 'emergency exit'.

Joshua thought of the perfect idea to make people not notice him. Luckily, there aren't many people on that are of the door.

"Someone be with him so he won't do anything stupid." Seungcheol said.

"Me." Jeonghan involuntarily volunteered himself.

The five of them looked at him like he was insane.

"No, it's fine, Jun can come with me-"

"The fuck, I won't!" Jun loudly said.

"I will, Joshua." Jeonghan persuaded.

Joshua thinks Jeonghan was a big fool for volunteering himself but he's not in the position to say 'no' since none of his friends wanna get in his trouble.

"Fine. Come here." Joshua said and dragged Jeonghan, carefully walking towards the exit door.

Joshua was about to throw hands when he saw that the emergency exit was only made up of thin metal stairs. 

"Shit. Close that." He ordered Jeonghan to close the door.

It was windy at the top but Joshua was determined to go down at the bottom floor quickly. And they did, it was a success.

They were both panting when they reached the cold ground, outside the arena. They stayed for a moment in the cold dark alley to breathe when Joshua noticed a person nearing them at the corner of his eyes.

The person dressed up like one of the the concert staffs. 

"Hey!" The person called them out. 

He and Jeonghan looked at each other with nervous eyes. But Joshua being Joshua, he was smart to think of an excuse.

He grabbed Jeonghan's face and kissed him like there's no tomorrow. 

Fortunately, Jeonghan was not facing the staff so the person can't look at his surprised face. Meanwhile Joshua naturally closed his eyes as soon as his lips touched Jeonghan's. He deepened the kiss, making it more natural and making them look like a real couple.

Joshua somehow enjoyed the taste of Jeonghan's lips. His tongue explored the insides of Jeonghan's mouth.

Sweet like strawberries.

Joshua felt the person stop and was about to leave.

"Kids these days." Was a snicker that they heard before Joshua pulled away and silenced enveloped them.

"Jeonghan, I'm sor-"

"It's fine." Jeonghan cut him off with a smile.

"Still, I'm sorry. I can't think of anything." Joshua said and stared at the ground.

"It's fine, really. I-I liked it." Jeonghan blurted out, causing Joshua to look at him and smirk.

"I mean, I, whatever." Jeonghan can't find the words to explain what he just said.

Joshua widened his smirk.

"You have to go home. It's already 12 am. Your parents must be looking for you." Joshua said and reached out his hand for Jeonghan.

"I live on my own." Jeonghan took Joshua's hand as they walked towards his car.

"Where do you live?" Jeonghan asked Joshua.

"Nearest dorm at the uni. I live with Seungcheol. That's why we're that close." Joshua answered.

"Oh that explains your chaotic vibe with him." Jeonghan laughed.

"Hey! We're not that chaotic, he's still more chaotic when he's with Jun." Joshua defended.

"Are a music major? Since, you know, your band." Jeonghan asked while Joshua leaned on his car.

"Art. I'm classmates with Minghao, Jun's boyfriend." Joshua simply answered.

"Oh, then, why did you have a band?"

"I'm musically talented, Jeonghan." Joshua confidently said.

The both of them laughed like fools.

"You smoke?" Joshua asked.

Jeonghan shook his head no.

Joshua then lit up his cigarette and put it in between his beautiful lips.

"Tell me if you don't like it, I'll distance myself." Joshua said.

"No! No! It's fine. I'm used to it." Jeonghan truthfully said.

Joshua whipped out his phone and played a song.

"He didn't sing this. Too bad." He muttered.

"Yeah, I like that song." Jeonghan said.

_Remember when we first met?_

_You said 'light my cigarette'._

"It's getting late, Jeonghan. You sure you don't wanna go home yet?"

"Will you accompany me?" Jeonghan flashed his sweetest smile to Joshua.

Joshua felt something in his chest.

"Alright. I'll just text Wonwoo so they don't have to worry about me."

Jeonghan almost jumped at Joshua's answer. He didn't really expected him to agree with his deal. 

"Let's go." Joshua said as he stepped on his cigarette, destroying the flame.

The two got in Jeonghan's car and drove to his apartment.

Joshua was shocked at how rich Jeonghan is. He thought he lived in a simple apartment but no, he lives in a fucking penthouse. 

"You live here? All by yourself?" Joshua asked him with wide eyes.

"Yeah, why?" Jeonghan's eyes were full of wonder.

"Nothing." Joshua shook his head no.

"I'll guess I'll be home now then. I think you're fine now." Joshua said as he walked Jeonghan to his door.

Jeonghan was quick to grab his arm.

"Stay. It's late." Jeonghan showed his puppy eyes.

"I can't. It's late." Joshua tried to reason out.

"That's why you should stay. Because it's late. I can't sleep knowing that you're still in the streets this late."

But Joshua has always been on the streets this late.

He checked the time. 1:07 am.

"I'll stay for a while then." Joshua said.

"Stay until morning!" Jeonghan almost pleaded.

Joshua sighed and smiled at how determine Jeonghan was on making him stay.

"Fine."

They entered Jeonghan's unit. The smell of sweet vanilla and the warm feeling of home welcomed Joshua. His house was just like him. Sweet and welcoming.

Joshua felt embarrassed at how he looked like a parasite inside Jeonghan's home. 

"Feel at home." Jeonghan smiled at him.

Jeonghan didn't know what he was doing. All he knew is that he wants to be with Joshua. The smell of cigarette mixed with the sweet scent of his house.

"Are you hungry?" Jeonghan asked.

"Kinda." Joshua answered simply.

"I have ice cream in the fridge."

"Don't you cook?" Joshua asked.

"I-I don't know how." Jeonghan answered and looked away embarrassed.

Joshua chuckled and got up from his seat.

"Are YOU hungry?" Joshua asked.

"Yes."

"What's your favorite food?" Joshua asked again.

"Anything that's chicken."

"And sweets?"

"How'd you know?" Jeonghan was surprised.

"You look like someone who likes sweet things." Joshua laughed and stared at his strawberry pink sweater.

Jeonghan felt his cheeks heat up.

Joshua went to Jeonghan's fridge and looked for what he can cook.

Surprisingly, Jeonghan's fridge was full. Joshua wondered who cooks for him.

"If you don't know how to cook then how the fuck do you eat?" Joshua said as he started to prepare ingredients.

"Order. Most of the time, my friends cook for me."

Many minutes passed and Joshua was finished on his spicy chicken for Jeonghan. He put it in a plate and placed it infront of Jeonghan who has been staring at him the whole time he was cooking.

Jeonghan complimented him all throughout their whole late dinner. Joshua laughed at Jeonghan's cuteness.

They finished eating when Joshua noticed an untouched guitar on Jeonghan's living room.

"You play?" He asked.

Obviously, no. The guitar was untouched and full of dust.

"No, my fingers hurt." Jeonghan pouted.

"Can I?" Joshua asked gesturing for the guitar.

"Of course!" Jeonghan answered quickly.

Joshua started to tune the instrument and played little strums. He was humming a familiar song, when Jeonghan sat beside him offered him some ice cream.

Jeonghan was staring at him for too long that Joshua noticed.

"Am I too handsome?" Joshua smirked.

Jeonghan's eyes went wide and he looked away while blushing.

"I'm sorry." 

Involuntarily, Joshua cupped his face and made him look his way.

He didn't know what to do next, all he knew was that their lips crashed together.

Jeonghan put down the to bowls of ice cream on his table while he leaned back more on his couch, making Joshua dominate on top of him while kissing.

Joshua loves how Jeonghan tastes like. Even though they've only kissed one time. Met two times. 

There's something in Jeonghan that drove Joshua into wanting more.

Joshua felt himself getting hard.

He grabbed Jeonghan's hand and put them near his crotch.

"You wanna taste something sweeter, baby?"

Joshua asked. And he was definitely not talking about the ice cream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fools // strawberries and cigs - troye sivan
> 
> i wanna make a filo au but bdkcbkcjscjfjkr


	4. bittersweet

"You wanna taste something sweeter, baby?" Joshua smirked at a very flushed Jeonghan.

Jeonghan involuntarily nodded. He felt like he was drunk because of Joshua's luscious lips. 

Before they knew it, Joshua grabbed Jeonghan's small hands and let it palm his growing bulge. Lips locked with each other, Jeonghan moaned as he felt Joshua's big tent.

"Josh, I w-want to-" Jeonghan was cut off when Joshua hungrily placed his lips on the latter's neck, biting and nibbling it.

"Want to what, baby?" Joshua said against Jeonghan's neck.

Joshua pulled away and saw Jeonghan's eyes not leaving the his bulge. His tiny hands still caressing it.

Joshua took the message and unbuckled his pants. Jeonghan's eyes went wide, making Joshua smirk.

"You didn't answer my question." Joshua said.

"What?" Jeonghan muttered under his breath. Eyes still not leaving Joshua's crotch.

"What do you want?"

"I wanna taste something sweeter. Sweeter than your lips, Josh." Jeonghan tried his best to not sound awkward.

Joshua can't help but smirk at Jeonghan's answer.

"Then do it. Please daddy, baby." Joshua said and spread his legs wide while his arms also spread wide along the board of Jeonghan's couch.

Jeonghan kneeled infront of him and pulled down his boxers. Joshua's cock met with the skin of Jeonghan's face.

Joshua chuckled sexily at the view in front of him. He bit his lip and threw his head back when he felt Jeonghan's warm pretty lips wrapped around his tip.

"Lick it, baby. Yeah, like that." Joshua started to thrust his hip to Jeonghan's pretty mouth, slightly feeling the warm insides of it.

Jeonghan isn't exactly an innocent guy. Sure, he watched porn here and there. But he never got to do 'things' with someone. He believes that whoever he'll do it with, is special.

Jeonghan bobbed his head up and down on Joshua's cock while playing with the latter's balls. He felt Joshua grab a fistful of his hair and pushed him deeper, making the tip of Joshua's cock reach his throat. Jeonghan moaned at the feeling, sending vibrations throughout Joshua's body.

"AH FUCK!" Joshua moaned loudly.

Jeonghan felt himself getting hard. Before he can reach his own crotch, he felt Joshua twitch inside his mouth.

"Baby, I'm gonna cum!" 

Upon hearing Joshua's lovely moan, Jeonghan pulled Joshua's cock out of his mouth and roughly stroked it, putting it back to release his cum on Jeonghan's mouth.

"Good boy." Joshua leaned closer to Jeonghan and attached his lips on Jeonghan's neck.

"J-Josh, don't leave m-marks." Jeonghan said breathlessly as Joshua's hands played with his crotch and the other caressed the other side of his neck.

"I won't baby, trust me." Joshua said hotly and proceeded on kissing Jeonghan's neck, earning a consistent series of soft moans from Jeonghan.

"You're so good, Jeonghan. So fucking good for me." Joshua whispered and stared at Jeonghan's drunk eyes.

Jeonghan woke up to the sound of guitar playing and sweet honey laced voice singing. He opened his eyes and noticed that he's shirtless. He can't remember how he got inside his bedroom. The last thing he remembered from last night was him and Joshua's intense grinding.

_Joshua._

Jeonghan jolted up and looked for Joshua.

_Oh reckless abandon,_

_Like no one's watching you_

Jeonghan heard the familiar voice again. He walked up to his door and opened it, revealing Joshua's bare back facing him and playing his guitar.

_A moment, a love, a dream_

_A laugh, a kiss, a cry_

_Our rights, our wrongs_

Jeonghan felt something on his chest. An unfamiliar feeling that he never felt before. 

"Hey, you're awake." Joshua smiled at him.

Jeonghan didn't know how long he's been staring at the man in front. But he knows it's long enough for him to malfunction like this.

"Hey." Jeonghan said.

"I hope you didn't mind, but I cooked breakfast since, I kinda don't want either of us to spend, so, yeah." Joshua said and scratched the back of his head.

Jeonghan got none of that as his eyes traveled from Joshua's god-like face, to his luscious neck, to his buff arms, to his sinful hands that plays the guitar and to his chest down his stomach.

"You're eye-fucking me." Joshua smirked.

"Huh?" Jeonghan was still malfunctioning and didn't even notice Joshua was now right infront of him.

"Come on, let's eat." Joshua said and put Jeonghan's guitar back to it's case and placed it next to his tv. 

Jeonghan smiled at the thought Joshua. A stranger he met a few weeks ago. Inside his house, cooked him breakfast after a long night of blowjobs and intense grinding. 

"Thank you, Josh." 

Joshua only smiled as a response.

"You really like playing, huh?" Jeonghan asked Joshua as he walked out of his room and found the latter playing his guitar, again.

_Just stay there_

_'Cause I'll be coming over_

Jeonghan felt like he was suddenly hypnotized with Joshua's voice. His voice that changes depending on the song. His voice that's like an angel's. His voice that turns into a sexy sultry tone if he wants to.

_While our blood's still young, so young_

_Won't stop 'til it's over_

_Won't surrender_

But right now, Joshua's voice was like a movie. Maybe because of the song. Or the way his fingers skillfully played. Or maybe because Jeonghan felt like it was.

Or maybe, just maybe, Jeonghan knows he's feeling something for Joshua. Deeper than what he felt when he saw him play in that one gig. 

Joshua's voice was a movie.

It can be of different genre. And it's still beautiful no matter what the theme is. 

Joshua's voice was like a movie.

The one where you laugh, cry, love and dream in one moment.

"I like that song." Jeonghan blurted out.

Joshua looked up at him with a soft smile.

"You have taste."

"So do you." Jeonghan replied.

Joshua continued to play and sing. Jeonghan sat in front of him. 

Joshua isn't the sweetest guy in the world. He doesn't even know how to be affectionate. Maybe because of his background. Growing up in a mentally and emotionally abused household made him this way. 

But for Jeonghan, Joshua knew what sweet tasted like. 

Aside from all the make outs and blowjobs they shared last night. Joshua never tasted something as sweet as Jeonghan. 

"I better go." Joshua stopped and stood up, surprising Jeonghan with his sudden action.

"Wait!" Jeonghan grabbed Joshua's arm.

"Hang out with me again, please?" Jeonghan pouted.

"Of course, Jeonghan." Joshua smirked and ruffled Jeonghan's hair.

"No, I mean, hang out, literally. No dirty stuffs." Jeonghan said.

Joshua didn't know what to say. He was here for the pleasure but didn't expect Jeonghan to be serious in hanging out with him.

"If you haven't noticed, I like you, Joshua." 

Joshua was more shocked at the sudden confession.

"I, uh, I like you too, Jeonghan. As, uh, as-"

"As someone who pleasures you and as a friend, I know." Jeonghan smiled like what he and Joshua just said didn't make any sense.

"And you wanna hang out with me often because?"

"Because I like you."

Dead air.

Joshua felt like his throat was dried up. This wasn't the first time someone confessed to him. But this was the first time that he can't take a sudden confession. He felt like Jeonghan wasn't supposed to like him.

"Look, Jeonghan, you don't need to tell me that you like me, literally, if you liked me giving pleasure to you." Joshua said.

"But that's now what I meant." Jeonghan looked at him with sad eyes.

"I really like you, Joshua."

"I'm sorry. I need to go."

Joshua literally don't know what the fuck happened with Jeonghan and his sudden confession. Joshua sat at the back of the bus, earphones worn on his ears, phone in hand. The strong wind crashed on his face as the bus started to move.

_Songs of desperation_

_I played them for you_

Joshua hummed along to the song and tried to forget about what Jeonghan did. But he failed as flashbacks of Jeonghan's puppy eyes and angelic face lingers on his mind.

He got to his apartment and instantly heard Seungcheol's voice. 

"WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU SLEEP LAST NIGHT?" Seungcheol welcomed him.

"Good morning to you too, Cheol." Joshua faked a smile.

"ANSWER ME."

"Jeonghan's." Joshua answered simply.

"Oh. What did you do?" Seungcheol was furrowing his eyebrows.

"Nothing." Joshua said and laid down on his bed.

"I'm surprised. He likes you though, do you know that?"

Joshua's ears suddenly perked up.

"You knew?" Joshua faced Seungcheol, who was now sitting at the edge of his bed.

"So you knew now, huh? You sure you didn't do anything last night?" Seungcheol smirked.

"Nothing, Cheol. So how the fuck did you know he likes me?" 

"It's fucking obvious?"

"Well it's not to me." Joshua said.

"You're hopeless." Cheol hissed.

"We all are." Joshua replied.

"Another gig later at 9. Jun will send the location." Cheol suddenly changed the topic.

"We just had one the other night?" Joshua groaned.

"We haven't paid this month's rent, Joshua."

"Right, fuck."

Jeonghan fidgeted with his fingers while staring at his phone.

_Should I?_

He never felt this anxious before over a guy he just met.

_Maybe he's worth it._

He said and typed a message.

_**"Hey, it's Jeonghan :)"** _

And we wait for a reply.

A minute, none.

Five minutes, none.

Ten minutes, none.

Half an hour, none.

An hour, none.

_I can't do this._

Jeonghan felt helpless and laid on his bed. 

_A moment, a love, a dream_

_A laugh, a kiss, a cry_

He remembered Joshua's voice as he drifted off to sleep.

A heavy heart.

A bittersweet taste of pleasure and pain.

"We need the money, Jun." Joshua said with gritted teeth.

"And I told you that they won't hand it to me!" Jun replied with equal frustration.

"Alright. Day after tomorrow, Jun?" Seungheol got in between them before the snap each other's neck.

"We'll be fucking homeless by then, Cheol." Joshua said.

"Day after tomorrow, then." Jun said and shook hands with Seungcheol.

The atmosphere got less intense when Jun left the band members.

Wonwoo was leaning against the van window. Jihoon sat on the passenger seat, door open and head down.

Joshua stood behind Seungcheol, his hands balling into fists.

"Come with me and Jihoon. If ever we get kicked out." Seungcheol said quietly.

Joshua bit his lip and thought of a way to get out of this mess.

"I'll come home for a day or two. Next weekend." Joshua said.

"No. Come with me and Jihoon."

"You fucking know well I can't." Joshua grabbed Cheol's collar while the latter looked up at him with tired eyes.

Jihoon was quick to get in between them.

"FUCKING STOP!" Wonwoo shouted.

"Joshua. Listen to me. For once, please." Seungcheol sighed.

"Fine." Joshua said and harshly let go of Cheol's collar.

The four were startled by a ring on the phone. Seungcheol's phone. 

"Fuck." Seungcheol sighed.

"What?" Jihoon asked.

"Landlady." Seungcheol looked at Joshua.

Joshua paled and looked like he was about to breakdown. 

"Ma'am-"

"SEUNGCHEOL. YOU AND YOUR FRIEND IS THREE MONTHS LATE ON RENT. YOU DON'T NEED TO PAY THIS MONTH'S RENT, JUST BE HERE IN FIVE MINUTES TO TAKE OUT ALL YOUR FUCKING THINGS AND IF YOU CAN'T, I'LL FUCKING TAKE THEM OUT MYSELF." 

"Ma'am, wait-"

The line went dead.

Wonwoo pushed Joshua into the van with force to go to their apartment quickly

"Josh, breathe." Seungcheol said and sat down beside his friend. Jihoon drove the car very fast.

Joshua clenched his jaw tightly and balled his fists. Not bothering to breathe.

"JOSHUA." Seungcheol said with a firm voice.

"She'll take our things out." Joshua whispered.

"I'll make sure it's safe-"

"What if she'll break _it_?" Joshua said.

Seungcheol knew what he was talking about. The both of them froze.

" _She_ gave that to me, Cheol." Joshua cried.

"I promise, it'll be safe." Seungcheol said and clung to Joshua.

Upon arriving at their apartment, the two roommates saw boxes outside their door. Tiny shattered glass scattered on their wooden floor. Joshua sweated in cold.

_No._

Everything felt silent. Everything felt like it stopped the moment Joshua saw the Melodrama glass art.

 _Her_ Melodrama glass art.

Right at that moment, Joshua broke down on his knees. Everything became inaudible. 

Soon enough, darkness came over him. 

And the taste of his bittersweet reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sweet disposition - the temper trap
> 
> im really sorry for not updating for more than a week. im really trying my best but school's rlly hard :(( im really sorry. i'll still try my best to update at least weekly. again, im very sorry.
> 
> also, prepare for heavy angst.


End file.
